The holiday season brings family gatherings, friends’ parties, and office celebrations front-and-center. As a byproduct, it also makes alcohol readily available at every turn. If you’re in recovery, that combination can turn a season built around celebration into one of the hardest stretches of the year.
Staying sober during the holidays doesn’t happen by accident. It takes a plan, a reliable support system, and a few strategies you can lean on when things get difficult. If you want to learn how to enjoy sober holidays, you’ve come to the right place.
3 Triggers to Avoid for Sober Holidays
Relapse triggers refer to the events, dynamics, or situations that put individuals in recovery at risk of breaking their sobriety. When you’re committing to sober holidays, knowing what these triggers are can help you prepare for them ahead of time or, even better, avoid them altogether.
Here are a few of the most common holiday triggers that cause people to relapse during the holidays.
1. Holiday Stress
With pressure to decorate, prepare elaborate dinners, and buy gifts, the holiday season can be an especially stressful time of year. Stress is one of the leading causes of addiction relapses, tempting you to seek solace from these distressing emotions through drugs and alcohol use. Several aspects of the holiday season can cause stress levels to increase:
- Stressful family dynamics: Most people spend extended amounts of time with their families during the holidays, and complicated family dynamics can be enormously stressful. If your family frequently argues, or if there’s tension among certain family members, uncomfortable situations may arise during the holidays and tempt someone to relapse.
- Financial stress: The holidays are an expensive time. Purchasing nice gifts for loved ones can be a financial stressor for anyone, especially if they’re living paycheck-to-paycheck or have unpaid debts. People who find themselves in precarious financial situations during the holidays may be tempted to “relieve” their stress by compromising their sobriety.
- Busy schedules and obligations: For many people, it can feel like there’s no downtime during the holiday season. This general hectic feeling can be overwhelming for individuals in recovery who need relaxation and time for self care. Additionally, running late or being otherwise unprepared for holiday gatherings can be a major source of mental stress.
2. Being Around Loved Ones Who Drink or Use
Surveys suggest that around 65% of U.S. companies hold holiday parties, and over half of them serve alcohol at their event. Friends and family members who aren’t in recovery may also make substance use a central part of their holiday celebrations. Parties, dinners, and casual get-togethers often center around it, which puts people in early recovery in rooms full of triggers they’d otherwise be able to avoid.
If you find yourself at a holiday celebration where others are drinking or using drugs, it can be easy to fall into old habits.
3. Overestimating Your Sobriety
Believing you have complete control over your drinking or drug use, even after a long stretch of sobriety, is its own risk. Even people who feel confident in their sobriety can be caught off guard during the holiday season.
Regardless of how long you’ve been sober, “just this once” can feel justifiable at holiday parties, and it can quickly turn into a downward spiral. Addiction doesn’t take a holiday break, and your caution shouldn’t either.
How to Celebrate (and Enjoy!) Sober Holidays
Plan Ahead
The good thing about the holiday season is that you’ll always know when it’s going to show up. People are rarely surprised when their family plans a Thanksgiving dinner or a New Year’s Eve party, and a little preparation goes a long way once the invitations start arriving.
Planning ahead allows you to enjoy sober holidays without scrambling to avoid triggers. Here are some strategies for making sure you’re prepared:
- Confide in a loved one. Let a parent, sibling, or close friend know you’re concerned about a specific event or time of year. Designate a “support buddy” for the event who is willing to check in on you or help redirect the conversation if things get tense.
- Talk to your therapist. If you’re in individual or group therapy, use a session or two before the holidays to work through what you’re anticipating and build a concrete plan for the events on your calendar.
- Decide in advance what you’ll skip. Not every invitation needs a yes. If a specific gathering feels like more risk than it’s worth, it’s reasonable to decline. Protecting your sobriety isn’t rude, and you don’t owe anyone an explanation beyond what you’re comfortable sharing.
- Be prepared to leave. For the social gatherings you do attend, know that you can leave if you feel uncomfortable. Prepare responses for why you aren’t drinking or using drugs, and be ready to excuse yourself if those responses aren’t received well.
Create Sober Traditions
Part of what makes the holiday season so special is the unique traditions that you and your loved ones practice each year. But when those traditions involve substance use, it can feel impossible to stay committed to sober holidays.
Here are some new, substance-free traditions you can try this holiday season:
- Host a game night. If you’re looking for a way to gather with friends but avoid drinking, plan a sober activity for your get-together, like playing games. Board games, video games, and even outdoor games, like basketball or soccer, can be a fun way to spend time together when everyone gathers for the holidays.
- Enjoy outdoor activities. Each holiday season brings a plethora of opportunities to get outside. Pumpkin patches pop up everywhere throughout the fall. Walking or driving through Christmas light displays is a popular activity in December. Find a holiday-specific outing that you can enjoy with friends and family and make it an annual tradition.
- Give back to your community. Dedicate some time this holiday season to volunteering at a food pantry, animal shelter, or another local nonprofit that means something to you. Invite your family and friends to volunteer with you. Volunteering is a great way to spend time together, and you’ll feel good when you help those in need.
Prioritize Self-Care
The holiday season is often accompanied by stress, busyness, and emotional triggers. Winter holidays may be especially challenging, since there’s less daylight and the cold weather drives many people to spend their time indoors.
That’s why self-care is essential during the holiday season. If you’re not careful, all of the negative aspects of the holiday season can get you down, or even escalate to seasonal depression. Activities that help you relax and recharge can keep you feeling your best and help you stay committed to your sobriety.
Self-care activities you can practice this holiday season include:
- Take a nature walk.
- Go to the gym or exercise outdoors.
- Take a warm shower or bath.
- Try yoga and meditation.
- Write your thoughts down in a journal.
- Practice breathing exercises.
- Vent to someone you trust.
Give yourself grace during the holiday season. Take time for yourself, accept that things may not go to plan, and come up with a healthy plan for coping throughout this busy season.
Set Post-Holiday Goals
The transition out of the holidays can be its own challenge. Once the festivities end, some people feel a letdown, or notice that the structure and company that got them through December are suddenly gone.
Setting a few small, specific goals for the new year, rather than one large resolution, can help. Instead of a general goal like “stay sober,” try something specific and measurable, like:
- Building a new skill
- Going back to school
- Focusing on your career
- Rebuilding relationships
- Focusing on your faith
- Improving your emotional health
- Improving your financial situation
If you’re having trouble deciding what your goals should be, consider using the SMART framework: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound. Goals that follow this structure can be easier to accomplish, because they narrow down exactly what you want to accomplish. They’re also easier to track, and tracking them allows you to see the progress you’ve made over time.
Seek Professional Help If Needed
If you find the holiday season particularly challenging, don’t hesitate to seek professional support. Times like these are when people in recovery lean on their support networks the most, and that’s exactly why addiction treatment centers exist.
Therapists and counselors can provide strategies to cope with the emotional aspects of recovery during this time of year. It’s a sign of strength to ask for help when you need it.
What to Do If You Slip Up During The Holidays
Some people relapse during the holidays, but it doesn’t erase the progress they’ve made in recovery. If you slip up, don’t think that you’ll have to start all over again from nothing.
Consider revisiting treatment, and tell your therapist about what happened during the holidays. Whether you need more support, a different level of care, or just a few one-on-one sessions with your therapist to talk about what led up to it, they’ll be able to help.
Remember that recovery is a lifelong process, and it’s okay to revisit treatment if you need it. The best thing you can do after relapsing is to re-evaluate your needs and develop a new plan that can better equip you with the tools you need to stay sober.
Support That Goes Beyond Sober Holidays
If the weeks ahead feel like more than you want to face alone, our team at North Georgia Recovery Center is available to talk through what support could look like, whether that’s for the first time or as part of an ongoing plan. Our outpatient program combines individual therapy, group therapy, and family therapy in a structured continuum built around where you are right now.
Call (770) 726-2985 or reach out online to talk with our team today.
